Wednesday, September 21, 2022
“Understand this,
my dear brothers and sisters: You must all be quick to listen, slow to speak,
and slow to get angry.” (James 1:19, New Living Translation)
This was said to me by a senior
woman sitting next to me at Susan’s retirement party on Sunday at St. Luke’s
Anglican Church. Susan is retiring this week as the church secretary after 16
years. It has been a job she loved and excelled at. Her many, many duties included
being the church treasurer and book-keeper. She administered the day-to-day
affairs of the church, its bookings and its logistics. Yes, she typed the
bulletins and all that secretarial stuff.
But where she really shone was in
her ability to listen to the people with whom she came into daily contact, be
they a regular parishioner or a complete stranger. I think my wife has nice
ears, too, but what the woman meant was that Susan really listened to people. A
goodly portion of her job was pastoral care as she was often the first on the
front lines of pastoral care. Susan made time for people, be it on the phone or if they had come into her office in person and always listened attentively
to their stories and concerns. Even if
she had a dozen other things to do. Before the need got passed on to one of the
pastors, it was Susan who responded first.
Several people have mentioned that her gift of caring and compassionate listening
will be most sorely missed. Her capacity to listen and listen well was truly her
gracious ministry.
Listening can be hard work when
done well. It may even be a lost art. Our culture throbs with overly loud
opinions, people shouting out their views and sentiments, the noisy clamour of protests
and dissent. Everybody wants to have their voices heard but is anyone listening?
I am reminded of the suffering
Job. His three friends came to “console and comfort him.” (Job 2:11, NLT)
When they first set eyes on their friend their hearts were broken. “Then
they sat on the ground with him for seven days and nights. No one said a word
to Job, for they saw that his suffering was too great for words.” (v.13)
Silence was golden. Just their presence spoke volumes. The trouble started when
they spoke up against Job’s complaining and lamenting and wouldn’t shut up,
arguing with Job and blaming him and scolding him. All they really had to do
was listen but they couldn’t and wouldn’t.
“Turn your ear to listen to me; rescue me quickly. Be my rock of
protection, a fortress where I will be safe.” (Psalm 31:2, NLT) Albeit, this is a prayer of trust in God’s ability to
listen, but it reminds us that listening
provides a safe harbour for the one who is talking and sharing their lives. Listening
should make the other person feel safe. “Don’t turn away from me in my time
of distress. Bend down to listen, and answer me quickly when I call to you.” (Psalm 102:2, NLT)
“Fools think their own way is right, but the wise listen to others.” (Proverbs 12:15, NLT) Listening is that ability
to allow another person to be known, to be respected, to be understood, to feel
included and affirmed. There may be a time when one needs to speak or offer a response
but listening first leads us down the right path of being helpful and
insightful with what we might have to say. “Spouting off before listening to
the facts is both shameful and foolish.” (Proverbs 18: 13, NLT)
To borrow from Jesus - “Anyone with ears to hear should listen and
understand!” (Matthew 11:15,
NLT)
Dale
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